carhartt jeans.

another trend, another purchase.

i did it. i finally bought my first pair of carhartt pants: a cove-blue, relaxed-fit pair of jeans. i get to add it to my collection of trending pants, right next to the baggy levi’s i got recently. as i tried the jeans on, i didn’t like them much; they were tight around the thighs and not as stretchy as i thought “relaxed” jeans should be. and yet, without much second-guessing, i took the tag off and threw them in the washer. just like that.

over the years, media platforms like tiktok have completely changed the fashion scene, for better or worse. “fast fashion” is taking over the entire industry. companies sacrifice quality to meet demands for new styles. websites like romwe and shein, notoriously known for their super cheap prices but also their dirt poor quality, are profiting so much by jumping on the bandwagon of these tiktok fashion trends. it became so universal that it’s so easy to walk outside and find people all dressed in a similar way from head to toe.

despite my understanding of this, i still fall victim to it. i’ve spent so much money on completely revamping my closet, constantly attracted to the ever-changing popularity of certain clothing pieces. i mean, how could i not be? the glory in seeing those tiktok videos is that these are average people. normal kids my age suddenly transforming into fashion icons. i wanted to be like them. if a few clothing pieces and some new hair styles could make them so attractive, then it could do the same to me, right?

to me, these aren’t just a new pair of jeans. no. these are the key to looking good, and thus, feeling good. maybe its the thought of getting complimented in public or the mere recognition of the carhartt logo that makes me want to continue down this trend. i know for a fact that in the future, i’ll look back and question why i’ve become like this, but i just can’t help it. being a part of the trend, a part of the fad, is exciting and sometimes all we can do as people in a society is follow along. nobody likes getting excluded.

perhaps i’m even overcomplicating things, though. maybe i just love the idea of finding new clothing pieces that stick out so much. that idea of having new “favorites” all the time. it’s like opening a gift box with every new purchase. the psychology behind fast fashion is there. the endless selections, each tailored to our vision of what we can look like at our best, matched with the irresistible prices, is a key to instant gratification.

as i’ve gotten older and am now in my 20s, i always have the desire to look presentable whenever i go out. this isn’t elementary and high school anymore, where uniforms or sweatpants were the norm. this is the real world we’re talking about. people probably don’t care about our looks as much as i’m making it seem, but in the ever-so-small chance that we do run into someone that does take note of our presence, then why not have it be a great note? why not have it blow them away and leave a sweet thought in their head. maybe this doesn’t apply everywhere in the world, but i know for a fact that there is some weight to this when walking around a place like manhattan, where everyone seems like a superstar.

it’s funny that i say all of this, because i’ve told everyone around me that when i finally move away for medical school, i’ll be a minimalist. i’ll only bring a handful of clothing items, enough to fit a single rack and no more; 20–25 clothing items and that is it. yet, it makes no sense how that would be possible when i’m buying so many new items every month. in my mind, i justify it by saying that i’m going through a selection process so i can figure out what is considered essential, but even that doesn’t feel like the truth.

on the other hand, my mother has been wearing the same stuff for years on end. she hardly gets the chance to go shopping and find pieces that fit well, and so instead, she just goes back to wearing her usual clothing. that’s the same way with my brother too. and my dad. so i guess that leaves me as the odd one out, with a constant itching for temporary satisfaction. i don’t know what that says about me, but it has me questioning a lot today. as i stare at these jeans, knowing they won’t be comfortable when i wear them, i don’t really know what to think anymore. but i like the pants. i do…

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